Examples of Female Stoic Resilience

Resilience & Mothers    Resilience - Continued pursuit of goals despite adversity Resilience has been the core reqmnt of people and orgs through the years and got a huge spotlight during/post pandemic time. Now we are certain of more uncertainty, more change, and a constant push for individuals/ teams/ orgs to deliver outcomes quicker. I have always admired the resilience shown by all the women I am close to. They manage multiple facets of life facing adversities at every corner that men (at least I) can’t even imagine. My mother tops the list and is my role model for a resilient person. My father was in the Indian Navy, which meant he would sail most of the year. Sometimes he would be called at middle of the night and go off sailing with no indication of his return date. This left the responsibility of bringing up three boys (the usual naughty ones) to my mother. My mother had only primary school education in a village in Uttarakhand (no roads, electricity, or pipe water), who shifted to the city after marriage. I do believe bringing 3 kids with this background is as tough as leading a start-up, with no subject matter knowledge, in a new country. So how did her resilience led her to succeed in raising 3 kids, all of whom ended up with great careers? (These points apply in the corporate world too.) ·       A robust support system: Sailor’s accommodation was temporary, which meant two families shared one flat as one was given acco for only 3 years, hence sharing. We shared a 2BHk and later a 3 BHK flat with another family till I graduated. This ensured that when the husbands were away, the women would support each other. Then there was the external support provided by families from a particular state to another family from the same state. Uttarakhandi families, some of whom were distant relatives, would help/guide my mother. ·       Failing & Learning: My mother kept learning the ways of big cities. How to run a house, take kids to hospital, ensure they did their homework, etc. She failed many times in doing new things, but never gave up. Everyone around her encouraged her, and she kept learning. She learnt to sew, write in English, fight for her and her kids’ rights with school and naval authorities. She NEVER gave up. ·       Remain strong and calm: We never saw our mother dejected or worried. She was a pillar of strength to all of us. Whatever the situation, she had unshakeable faith that things will turn out fine. When I got through NIT Durgapur, my dad gave up as he could not afford his elder son doing his MBA from a pvt college and fund his middle son’s engineering too. My Mom was confident that we will be able to manage and sent me packing. As predicted, my parents somehow managed. I am sure this will ring a bell with most of the people from my generation, especially if their father were in defence. There are millions and millions of mothers who have shown resilience in the face of ever-changing adversities. Thank you!

Sheroes Amongst Us: A Journey of Resilience Reading Sheroes Amongst Us has been an inspiring exploration of resilience, courage, and leadership. This anthology, co-authored by Falguni Desai and Amit Nagpal, PhD features 32 extraordinary women who have broken barriers and redefined success. Here are reflections on eight remarkable Sheroes: 1. Ritu Mathur - “Aham Brahmasmi: Turning Setbacks into Stepping Stones” She embodies inner strength, transforming workplace harassment and personal loss into opportunities for growth while mentoring leaders with the Japanese concept of KiKi—finding opportunity in crises. 2. Roma Balwani - “Empathy in Action: Leading with Purpose” From receptionist to leadership roles, she drives Indian Deaf Cricket Association with empathy and determination, balancing career and motherhood seamlessly. 3. Rucha Nanavati - “From Loss to Legacy: Building Bonds Through Empathy” She turned personal tragedy into purpose, leading nonprofit initiatives in health and education while emphasizing lifelong learning and mentorship. 4. Sarita Bahl - “C’est La Vie: Crafting Sustainability with Passion” She carved her path in corporate sustainability, guided by her philosophy C’est la vie. Her resilience shines through her work in ESG and CSR. 5. Seemantinee Khot - “Sowing Seeds of Change: A Farmer’s Vision for Impact” She bridges boardrooms and fields, contributing to Asia-Pacific’s Women and Agriculture Policy with her unorthodox upbringing and expertise in agriculture. 6. Shilpi Thapar - “Purse Power: Inspiring Women Through Governance” She champions financial independence and integrity while mentoring future leaders in corporate governance and sustainability. 7. Suchita Bhhatia (Filmmaker) - “Breaking the Glass Ceiling: A Filmmaker’s Journey” She persevered in the male-dominated film industry, advocating for mental well-being in schools while creating impactful documentaries. 8. Urvashi Prasad - “Surviving Stage 4: A Beacon of Hope” She overcame workplace discrimination and cancer to become a policy architect at NITI Aayog, inspiring others to champion themselves. Amit Nagpal, PhD co-author of Sheroes Amongst Us, emphasizes that everyone faces struggles, but when those struggles become victories, they become stories of triumph, making each person a Shero. This book is a testament to the indomitable human spirit and reminds me of the Sheroes in my own life—my mother and wife—whose support has been pivotal in shaping my journey. I highly recommend Sheroes Amongst Us as a guide for positive change and resilience. Herewith, I conclude my reflections on the book. #SHEROES

I was talking to a recruiting manager at a firm last week and I was asking him about the hiring partners for the role he wanted to discuss. When it came to the relevant female partner, he paused and then called her "perfectly nice, but stoic." She's a female partner who graduated from law school in the late 80s. She is also a member of the queer community, and has been out for most of her career. All I could think was - stoic makes sense. Imagine how many older partners' brains broke at the thought of this woman rising up. Imagine the microaggressions (and macroaggressions!) she faced as she rose up anyway. Imagine how alone she must have felt for her formative years as a lawyer. Imagine how many things she had to break to get where she is. So, yeah, she's stoic. That may not be who she fundamentally is, but how she was formed on her travels to partnership. She may have been forged and hardened in the fire of that path. My hope is that other female partners (and queer partners and partners of color) will not need to be made stoic as they, too, rise.