Reading Emotional Signals

The Silent Killer of Executive Presence It's not just *what* you say 83% of executive presence isn't about your words. It's about the invisible signals you're sending. Here are 11 communication mistakes that quietly kill your influence, and how successful leaders fix them: 1. Ignore Nonverbal Cues ❌ Missing the signals before words are spoken ✅ What great leaders do: Notice tone, posture, energy. ✅ Then ask: "I sense hesitation - what's on your mind?" 2. Premature Self-Disclosure ❌ Sharing your story before others feel heard ✅ What great leaders do: "That sounds challenging." ✅ "What mattered most to you?" (Your story can wait) 3. The Blame Game ❌ Using "why" questions create defensiveness ✅ What great leaders do: Switch to "what" or "how" ✅ "What's the biggest roadblock here?" 4. The Silent Rush ❌ Filling every pause because silence feels awkward ✅ What great leaders do: Count to 5. ✅ A VP client tried this and said: "I got better answers in one week than the last 3 months" 5. The Solution Sprint ❌ Assuming every conversation needs fixing ✅ What great leaders do: Ask first ✅ "Are you looking for solutions or just need to process?" 6. Surface-Level Syndrome ❌ Asking shallow questions that block real connection ✅ What great leaders do: "What excites you most about this?" instead of "How's it going?" 7. The Energy Mismatch ❌ Being upbeat when the room is serious (or vice versa) ✅ What great leaders do: Match the emotional temperature first, then guide it where needed 8. The Open Loop ❌ Ending conversations without clear next steps ✅ What great leaders do: "Let's confirm: We agreed on X, and you'll have Y done by Friday" 9. The Talking Trap ❌ Speaking more than listening ✅ What great leaders do: Follow 80/20 - Listen 80%, speak 20%. 10. The Armor Effect ❌ Keeping conversations strictly professional ✅ What great leaders do: Share calculated vulnerability. "Here's a challenge I faced recently..." 11. The Helper's Blindspot ❌ Giving advice when support is needed ✅ What great leaders do: "Do you want me to help problem-solve, or just listen?" Real presence isn't about power moves. It's about making others feel deeply understood. What’s the smartest communication move you’ve ever seen? Share with me in the comments. ♻ Repost this to build better leaders. ➕ Follow me (Meera Remani) for clarity in your leadership journey. 🔔 Join my upcoming Masterclass to build executive presence, influence senior leaders, and get promoted to VP-CXO roles. Link in comments.

After analyzing 1,000s of first impressions it’s clear: A first impression is made before you say a single word. And there are 3 mistakes costing you opportunities: For context, most people (especially introverts) want to believe their first impression starts when they start speaking. The science says otherwise: Someone decides if they like you, trust you or want to work with you, the moment they first see you - when you walk into a room, open a door, or even when someone looks at your profile picture. After analyzing thousands of first encounters, I've identified what I call the 'triple threat' of first impression mistakes that people unknowingly make: 1. Making yourself small: Tucking your arms close to your sides and hunching your shoulders signals low confidence and submissiveness. The less space you take up, the less powerful you appear. This is why waiting for your job interview or date while checking your phone is sabotaging you before you've said hello. Every time you look down at your device, you accidentally adopt what scientists call the 'universal defeat posture': - chin tucked - shoulders hunched - making yourself small In evolutionary terms, you literally look like a loser. (Yikes!) 2. Hiding your hands: When your hands are in pockets, under the table, or out of sight, it creates subconscious distrust. Evolutionarily, we need to see hands to feel safe and assess intentions. 3. Avoiding eye contact: We experience a chemical burst of oxytocin during direct eye contact, which increases trust and connection. Avoiding eye contact in those first few seconds prevents this critical bonding opportunity. Research shows these first impressions are lasting. If you've made a bad one, recovery is difficult - but not impossible if you practice the right body language. Instead, adopt the confident alternative: - keep your hands visible and expressive - take up appropriate space with good posture - make deliberate eye contact in the first few seconds Master these 3 elements and you'll create positive, accurate first impressions that open doors rather than close them.

How I mastered negotiation before I knew what it was.   Growing up in a rough neighborhood taught me something school never did:   "How to handle conflict."   And not with my fists, but with words.   One of the most powerful tools I learned on my own was “𝗹𝗮𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴” emotions.   It’s a simple but effective strategy.    By naming the other person’s emotions, you can de-escalate tension and open the door to real communication.   Here’s how it worked for me:   𝟭. 𝗢𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗲𝗲𝘁𝘀:   When fights were about to break out, I’d say, “It seems like this is about territory, not us.”    Often, that was enough to shift the focus and avoid violence.    𝟮. 𝗔𝘁 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗲:   During family arguments, I’d say, “It looks like you’re stressed about money, not what I did.”    That turned heated moments into calmer discussions.   𝟯. 𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿𝗶𝘁𝘆:   We often felt targeted by police.    Instead of reacting, I’d label their concerns: “It seems like you’re worried about safety.”    That made them see me as cooperative, not a threat.   As I got older, I realized these skills weren’t just survival tactics.    They were 𝗻𝗲𝗴𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗲𝗰𝗵𝗻𝗶𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀.   Here’s why 𝗹𝗮𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 works:    - It helps build trust and opens up dialogue. - It shows you understand the other person’s feelings.   - It shifts the conversation from confrontation to collaboration.   Good labels typically take the form of specific phrases that avoid using first-person pronouns.     Start your sentences with phrases like:     - “It seems like…”   - “It looks like…”   - “You look like…”   For instance:   - "It seems like you're feeling overwhelmed with the current situation."   - "It looks like you're passionate about ensuring quality in the project."   - "You look like you're concerned about how this change will impact your team."   Avoid first-person pronouns in phrases such as:   - "What I'm hearing..." or  - "I think..."    Why? Using "I":   - Keeps focus on them not you - Makes them feel undervalued - Shows you don't have genuine interest in what they have to say.   By mastering the art of labelling, negotiators can create a more empathetic, open, and productive negotiation environment.    Not sure how to master this? DM me and let's have a chat. ----------------------------- Hi, I’m Scott Harrison and I help executive and leaders master negotiation & communication in high-pressure, high-stakes situations.  - ICF Coach and EQ-i Practitioner - 24 yrs | 19 countries | 150+ clients   - Negotiation | Conflict resolution | Closing deals 📩 DM me or book a discovery call (link in the Featured section)

I’ve found myself navigating meetings when a colleague or team member is emotionally overwhelmed. One person came to me like a fireball, angry and frustrated. A peer had triggered them deeply. After recognizing that I needed to shift modes, I took a breath and said, “Okay, tell me what's happening.” I realized they didn’t want a solution. I thought to myself: They must still be figuring out how to respond and needed time to process. They are trusting me to help. I need to listen. In these moments, people often don’t need solutions; they need presence. There are times when people are too flooded with feelings to answer their own questions. This can feel counterintuitive in the workplace, where our instincts are tuned to solve, fix, and move forward. But leadership isn’t just about execution; it’s also about emotional regulation and providing psychological safety. When someone approaches you visibly upset, your job isn’t to immediately analyze or correct. Instead, your role is to listen, ground the space, and ensure they feel heard. This doesn't mean abandoning accountability or ownership; quite the opposite. When people feel safe, they’re more likely to engage openly in dialogue. The challenging part is balancing reassurance without minimizing the issue, lowering standards, or compromising team expectations. There’s also a potential trap: eventually, you'll need to shift from emotional containment to clear, kind feedback. But that transition should come only after the person feels genuinely heard, not before. Timing matters. Trust matters. If someone is spinning emotionally, be the steady presence. Be the one who notices. Allow them to guide the pace. Then, after the storm passes, and only then, you can invite reflection and growth. This is how you build a high-trust, high-performance culture: one conversation, one moment of grounded leadership at a time.

The first rule I was taught in business? Something that came back to haunt me. Let me explain. Growing up, I was told: Keep business information close to the chest. The belief was: If employees knew too much… revenue, challenges, what’s really going on… they might use it against you. That’s the mindset I saw modeled. So at first, I followed it. The result? ❌ Team members felt like outsiders, not owners ❌ Trust eroded each time something surfaced indirectly ❌ Morale dropped (it’s hard to stay motivated when you don’t know what you’re working toward) ❌ It slowed us down (more questions, more confusion) ❌ It created silos (departments focused on surviving, not collaborating) I knew something was broken, but didn’t know how to fix it. Until… a hero came along. I hired Sean to replace me as CEO. And one of his first decisions was something I was feeling in my heart all along. That we need to lead with transparency. So we did a full 180. Now, once a quarter, we host an all-hands meeting where we share everything… no sugarcoating. ✔️ Revenue growth (or decline) ✔️ Viewer stats and content performance ✔️ What’s working ✔️ What’s broken ✔️ New bets we’re making (and the ones we’re letting go of) Yesterday, we opened the books and laid it all out for nearly 100 team members in person and 100+ tuning in remotely. The wins, the losses, all of it. The new result? Transparency has done something that secrecy never could: It’s built trust. Ownership. Alignment. What I’ve come to learn is, when everyone knows the scoreboard: They don’t just clock in… they lean in. The old way was fear-based. This way? It’s mission-based. And in today’s world, that makes all the difference.

SMART STICKER READS REAL EMOTIONS BENEATH THE SURFACE A new stretchable, rechargeable sticker developed by researchers can detect authentic emotional states by measuring physiological signals like heart rate, skin temperature, and humidity, even when facial expressions are misleading. The wearable patch transmits real-time data to mobile devices, helping health providers assess mental health remotely. Unlike traditional emotion recognition systems, this device integrates multiple sensors and facial analysis while preserving user privacy. With AI-powered accuracy and wireless functionality, it offers promise for applications in telehealth, early intervention, and monitoring emotional well-being. 3 Key Facts: 1. Multi-Signal Detection: Measures skin temperature, humidity, heart rate, and oxygen independently without interference. 2. AI Emotion Recognition: Achieved 96.28% accuracy for acted emotions and 88.83% for real ones. 3. Remote Monitoring: Wirelessly transmits data for use in telemedicine and early mental health intervention. Source: https://lnkd.in/gdn6jFeF

High performers beware: I just had a coaching call with someone who consistently gets high marks at work, but recently received feedback that they weren’t working as hard on building relationships with their coworkers. Here’s what I told them: ▶ Praise in public: Take every opportunity to raise up the people you work with. I have been known to use memes, songs, movies, and more to show a team member how much I appreciate them. ▶ Be vulnerable: The best way to get to know someone is to get someone to know you. Take the lead in sharing your own personality and interests with the people you work with and see who reciprocates. ▶ Keep a personal file: I use a “Personal CRM” to track the names, contact info, and significant details of everyone in my professional network. I even keep contingency plans in case they go rogue (joking. maybe.) ▶ Master the dreaded Zoom call small talk: Put yourself in the mind of a host or emcee. You don’t need a stand-up routine, but even some light conversation to open up / close the call puts everyone in a better mood. ▶ Model successful behavior: Find the few people in your office known for having a great presence, and learn from them. Success leaves clues. ▶ Take full advantage of the office: If you do have the opportunity to work in an office, take advantage of slow moments to have conversations with others. Working in an office doesn’t mean working remotely at your desk. Get moving! These are a few quick tactics we ideated on during our call that may seem small, but a relationship is the culmination of small things, done over time. Good luck out there, and let me know of any tactics you’ve developed at work to make connecting with your coworkers a little easier!

"The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said." – Peter Drucker After years in this profession, I've developed the ability to quickly assess the mood of my audience—whether they’re enjoying the training, feeling restless, or fully engaged. This skill comes with experience, as over time, we become more adept at reading the subtle cues in body language that reveal the true feelings of those we’re speaking to. Are you able to read the #bodylanguage of the people you're interacting with?🤔 Being a great communicator goes beyond just words—it's about understanding all facets of our interaction with people. One of the most valuable skills in #effectivecommunication is the ability to read #bodylanguage. By paying attention to non-verbal cues, we can gauge the comfort level of the person we’re speaking with and adjust our approach accordingly. A smile, a nod, or even a slight shift in posture can speak volumes. When we understand these signals, we not only create a more comfortable environment but also build deeper connections. Here are a few tips to get better at reading non-verbal cues: ✨Observe #FacialExpressions: Notice micro-expressions like raised eyebrows or a slight frown. These often reveal true emotions that words might not convey. ✨Pay Attention to #Posture: A person’s stance can indicate their level of confidence, openness, or discomfort. ✨Observe #EyeContact: The amount and type of eye contact can reveal interest, trust, or even anxiety. ✨#Listen to #Tone of #Voice: The way words are spoken can change their meaning. A soft tone can show empathy, while a firm one might express confidence. ✨Watch for #Gestures: Hand movements, whether open or closed, can signal whether someone is feeling defensive or engaged By improving our ability to read these #nonverbalcues, we enhance our #communicationskills and develop meaningful interactions. Are there any other tips you would offer for improving the ability to read body language? #CommunicationSkills #BodyLanguage #EffectiveCommunication #Leadership

𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐌𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲: 𝐂𝐨𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐌𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 As a sport psychologist, I often talk to athletes about coping with negative emotions following an error (e.g., dropped ball, misplaced pass, or a missed penalty), and how their reaction to mistakes is very important. It is important that athletes (and people) don't dwell on mistakes when they are still in the performance situation - reflection can occur later - and manage their emotions quickly to continue performing so that one mistake does not impact the remainder of the performance. This allows them to prepare for the next play or involvement. This video highlights why this is so important - Ronaldo fails to score from a free kick, outside the box, and within a matter of seconds, he has another opportunity to score. If athletes dwell too on a mistake or a setback and don't cope effectively with negative emotions, they may not be ready for their next opportunity. I have researched coping and coping effectiveness among elite athletes for over twenty years, but this is the first time I have considered the speed at which a person can alleviate negative emotions to be critical. 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗘𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻-𝗙𝗼𝗰𝘂𝘀𝗲𝗱 𝗖𝗼𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗴? Coping strategies used to regulate emotional distress during a stressful episode are considered emotion-focused coping strategies (Lazarus & Folkman, 1984). 4️⃣ 𝗦𝘁𝗲𝗽𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗖𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝗘𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗹𝘆 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗡𝗲𝗴𝗮𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗘𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗗𝘂𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗲𝘁𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 1️⃣ Recognise how you feel after a stressful incident (i.e., lost point, poor shot, or wrong call from an official). 2️⃣ Accept this feeling. 3️⃣ Deploy an appropriate emotion-focused coping strategy. This will depend on what has happened and the time available to cope, but it could include any of the following:  🌬️ Deep Breathing 🖼️ Re-evaluate or reframe the situation 🙂 Forgive yourself for a mistake 💬 Engage in self-talk 👥 Seek social support 4️⃣ Generate a challenge state to create a positive emotion. Research has shown that challenge states can cause positive emotions (Thompson et al., 2020). Do this by: Focus on what you want to happen during the next point or next play and how you will achieve this. Reference. Mark Thompson PhD, John Toner, John Perry, Rachel Burke, PhD, & Adam Nicholls. (2020). Stress appraisals influence athletic performance and psychophysiological response during 16.1 km cycling time trials. Psychology of Sport & Exercise, (2020), 101682.

"𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐮𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐦. 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐯𝐮𝐥𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲. 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐛𝐥𝐞" This was the worst advice I ever received as a founder. And if I had followed it, we wouldn’t be where we are today. Back in 2015, when we were still figuring things out, we believed in one simple principle—𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲 𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭. We were open with our team about our numbers, challenges, and even vulnerabilities. But many seasoned founders at the time told us: "𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘷𝘦, 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘮." "𝘋𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘨𝘨𝘭𝘦𝘴—𝘪𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘬." "𝘚𝘢𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘴𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳." "𝘋𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘴𝘵—𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺’𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘥𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦." We were shocked. And honestly, it hurt to be judged like that. But we followed our gut. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐈’𝐦 𝐬𝐨 𝐠𝐥𝐚𝐝 𝐰𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐝. Instead of hiding and restricting, we shared our challenges and educated our team on business impact. The result? 💡 A team that thinks like owners, not employees. 💡 Developers who build with business context, not just code. 💡 Sales teams that sell what can actually be delivered. 💡 A culture where people feel valued, not used. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭? 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐚𝐝𝐦𝐢𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞. Not every piece of advice—deserves to be followed. Trust your instincts. Build the company you’d love to work at. And your people would fall in love with. #Entrepreneurship #Leadership #Transparency #Startup