Enhancing Feedback Receptivity

Your brain can't process praise and criticism simultaneously. That's why traditional feedback methods are harmful. But there's ONE discovery that creates growth, not resistance: Direct. Then Connect. Neuroscience shows our brains process praise and criticism through completely different neural pathways. That's why the "feedback sandwich" fails so spectacularly. When we buffer criticism with praise... The brain cannot process these mixed signals effectively. People see through it anyway. Studies show 74% of professionals detect sandwich feedback within seconds. Having directly managed 300+ people and coached over 100 founders on leadership and culture, I’ve seen the real impact of feedback. Here’s what works... Two simple steps: 1. DIRECT: First, get permission and deliver unfiltered feedback. "May I share some observations about your presentation?" Then state exactly what needs improvement. This activates voluntary participation, and increases receptivity greatly. 2. CONNECT: Then, separately reaffirm their value "Your contributions remain vital to our success." The key? Complete separation between these steps. Direct feedback gives a clean signal about what needs to change. Connection maintains psychological safety. They know their status isn't threatened. Getting permission isn’t a minor detail - it’s crucial. It fosters respect and trust before you give tough feedback. Setting the stage for it to land well. The neuroscience behind this is clear: A Gallup study shows regular feedback mechanisms result in 14.9% increase in employee engagement and a 21% increase in profitability. Companies implementing this see remarkable results: • Cisco saw 54% faster resolution of team conflicts • Adobe reported 30% reduction in employee turnover • Pixar found 22% higher willingness to challenge assumptions • Microsoft under Nadella accelerated deployment cycles by 31% The traditional sandwich approach can feel safer, but it creates distrust. Direct Then Connect can feel scarier, but it builds psychological safety. Humans are wired to prioritize belonging above almost everything. When feedback threatens our status, our brains go into protection mode. When feedback becomes clear and non-threatening, learning accelerates. Implementing this approach requires courage. You have to trust your relationship is strong enough to handle direct feedback. But that's the paradox: By being more direct, you actually build stronger relationships. Try it with your team this week. You might feel uncomfortable at first, but watch what happens to your culture. When feedback becomes clear and non-threatening, learning accelerates. And companies that learn faster win. - If you liked this post? Follow us for more insights on conscious leadership and building companies from the inside out. Proud to coach with Inside-Out Leadership: executive coaching by trained coaches who have founded, funded, scaled, & sold their own companies.

Virtuoso musicians make their craft look effortless, but they didn't reach that pinnacle alone. Behind their exceptional skill lies a network of mentors, teachers, and attentive listeners who provided feedback at every turn. Feedback acts as the enchanted wand that transforms raw talent into brilliance, and it holds the key to personal growth. To expedite your development, you must actively seek feedback. Here's how: 1. Thoughtful Selection: Carefully choose feedback providers, much like a musician selects collaborators. Opt for individuals genuinely invested in your growth, whether colleagues, friends, or mentors. 2. Precision in Inquiry: Avoid vague requests like "Give me feedback" and instead pose specific questions. Ask questions like "How can I enhance my presentation skills?" to ensure the feedback aligns with your objectives. 3. Embrace Diversity: Welcome varying opinions, even when they challenge your existing beliefs. Growth often emerges from discomfort and diverse perspectives. 4. Application and Refinement: Seeking feedback is just the beginning; true transformation happens when you apply it consistently. Now, let's delve into handling non-constructive feedback—the moments when feedback stings, akin to a discordant note in a beautiful melody: 1. Maintain Composure: When confronted with less-than-flattering feedback, keep your composure. Avoid reacting defensively or emotionally. 2. Uncover Hidden Value: In even the harshest feedback, there is often a nugget of truth hidden beneath the surface. Strive to extract that valuable insight, much like finding treasure in a sea of sand. 3. Foster Clarification: Engage in a constructive dialogue if you're uncertain about the feedback's intent or context. A simple conversation can often resolve misunderstandings, similar to addressing issues after a project setback. 4. Focus on Your Sphere of Control: Understand that not all feedback is entirely fair or accurate. In such cases, channel your energy towards areas you can influence or improve. 5. Release Unhelpful Feedback: If feedback proves genuinely unhelpful or unjust, don't carry it as a burden. Instead, let it go. Surround yourself with constructive feedback that propels your journey forward. Feedback is your compass for self-improvement, helping you fine-tune your skills. Actively seek it out and use it to compose your success story.

Feedback at work is broken. Hands up if you’ve ever felt your stomach knot at the words, “Can I give you some feedback?” 🙋♂️🙋♀️ You’re not alone. Despite good intentions, the way we often approach feedback at work can be counterproductive. Gallup found that only 25% of employees feel feedback helps them improve. That’s a massive disconnect! Imagine a workplace where feedback is actually welcomed, a tool that supports, empowers, and motivates. Here are 5 shifts to help you reframe the dreaded “feedback” and cultivate a culture of growth: ✅ Shift away from the term “feedback.” Why? The word itself triggers a defensive response in our brains. Let’s avoid sending people into fight or flight, which often doesn’t result in any learning. By opting for brain-friendly language like sharing 'thoughts' and 'ideas,' you create a safer space for dialogue and encourage a more collaborative exchange. ✅ Ask for permission. It’s a small but powerful step. A simple “Can I share some thoughts?” shows respect and gives the other person autonomy. It also lets the brain know that feedback is actually coming and gives the receiver the option to say, “Not right now.” ✅ Choose your moments wisely. Not every misstep warrants immediate feedback. We all have off days. If it's a one-time occurrence, prioritize genuine support over rushing to feedback. A simple "How are you doing today?" can often go a long way. Remember, fostering a strong relationship built on trust and psychological safety is crucial for ensuring your feedback is not only heard but actioned. ✅ Avoid labels and get specific. Instead of labeling someone as “unreliable,” describe the impact of a specific action. Likewise, with positive feedback, focus on concrete examples rather than vague praise. Avoid extremes: “never” and “always” are often not the case. ✅ Make it reciprocal. Lead by example. Regularly ask for feedback from your team. When you show vulnerability, you build trust and normalize the idea that feedback is a two-way street. It fosters a culture of continual learning. Let’s rewrite the rules. We’ve been stuck in a feedback rut for too long. Let's stop the amygdala hijacking. 🧠 By applying these tips, you can transform your workplace into one where feedback is a catalyst for growth and an eagerly anticipated conversation. What approaches have you found effective in making feedback an empowering experience? Let’s learn from each other!

💎 𝗠𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗔𝗿𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝗥𝗲𝗰𝗲𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗧𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝗙𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸/𝗦𝘁𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗴𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗟𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽, 𝗡𝗼𝘁 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗗𝗲𝗳𝗲𝗻𝘀𝗲𝘀 Receiving difficult feedback is something we all face, and it’s a frequent topic in my coaching sessions. Recently, I experienced this myself, and it served as a powerful reminder of just how challenging it can be, regardless of how much personal development work you've done. 💭 Constructive feedback can feel like a punch in the gut. It can trigger defensiveness, self-doubt, and even anger. These reactions are natural, but they can hinder our growth if we let them take over. I know the sting all too well. When I received feedback that pointed out my tendency to prioritize being entertaining over being effective, it wasn't easy to hear. Despite years of coaching others through similar situations, I felt the same flood of emotions my clients often describe. I wanted to defend myself, justify my actions, and dismiss the feedback. But I knew that wouldn't serve me in the long run. Ignoring or dismissing constructive feedback can stunt our professional and personal growth. It can lead to repeating the same mistakes, alienating colleagues, and missing opportunities for improvement. For leaders, the cost can be even higher, affecting team morale and organizational success. 🏆 Leaning into the discomfort is crucial. I reached out to my support network to process the feedback objectively. I looked for patterns and considered the perspectives of those who provided the feedback. Was their viewpoint different from mine? Did they value different outcomes? This analysis helped me understand the feedback more deeply and see the areas where I genuinely needed to grow. By embracing the feedback, I was able to make meaningful changes. I adjusted my approach to be more effective and aligned with the needs of my audience. This not only improved my performance but also strengthened my relationships with those who provided the feedback. They saw my willingness to grow and, as a result, felt more valued and respected. 😇 💯 Receiving feedback will never be easy, but it's a vital part of our journey toward becoming better leaders and individuals. By embracing it, analyzing it objectively, and implementing changes, we can turn difficult moments into powerful opportunities for growth. If you're struggling with feedback, know that you're not alone and that there is a path forward that leads to greater effectiveness and fulfillment. ***** 📥 Drop a comment below with "PDF," and I'll personally send you the comprehensive PDF for FREE. 🎁 #personaldevelopment #management #motivation #inspiration #selfhelp #productivity

𝗔𝘃𝗼𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀? 𝗛𝗲𝗿𝗲’𝘀 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗼 𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗽𝗶𝗿𝗲𝘀 𝗶𝗻 4 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗽𝘀.   (#4 is the most common miss.)   As leaders, we sometimes hesitate to give constructive feedback, worried that it might demotivate our team. But when done right, feedback doesn’t tear down—it builds up. The key is approaching it in a way that inspires growth instead of discouragement.   You may have heard of the "Sandwich" technique before as a poor method, but for me, and when done right. It's very effective.     Here’s how I approach it:   1 - 𝗦𝗲𝘁 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗹𝘆:   When you work with your team, set the expectations early on that you are their coach and there to help them reach their goals. This involves feedback. Gain permission to provide feedback as a team, and then on an individual level. It's as simple as "Would you mind if I make some suggestions?" - I use this with my son and football after the "tell first" method wasn't working well for us. Since then, he is choosing whether or not to get the guidance. 90% of the time, it's a yes.   2 - 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮 𝗣𝗼𝘀𝗶𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 Begin by recognizing what’s going well. Highlight a recent win, effort, or strength your team member has shown. This isn’t just “fluff”—it sets a foundation of trust and shows you see the value they bring.   3 - 𝗔𝗱𝗱𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗢𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝘂𝗻𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗚𝗿𝗼𝘄𝘁𝗵 Be clear and specific about the area for improvement. Vague feedback doesn’t help anyone grow. Instead of saying, “Your performance needs improvement,” try something actionable like, “I noticed in the last project that communication with the team could have been more frequent. Here’s an approach that might help next time…”   4 - 𝗪𝗿𝗮𝗽 𝗜𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗘𝗻𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗿𝗮𝗴𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 End with a note of confidence in their ability to improve. Reinforce that you’re in their corner and that you believe in their potential to rise to the occasion. A simple “I know you have what it takes to make this adjustment, and I’m here to support you” can go a long way. If you meant it.   Why the “sandwich” method? Because people are more receptive to feedback when they feel supported. It’s not about sugar-coating the issue; it’s about delivering it in a way that builds, rather than breaks, motivation.   If you’re avoiding a tough conversation because you fear demotivating your team, remember this: 𝗛𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸, 𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗻 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗲𝗺𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗵𝘆, 𝗶𝘀 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗽𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝘁𝗼𝗼𝗹𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘁𝗲𝗮𝗺 𝗴𝗿𝗼𝘄.   P.S. Do you like or dislike the sandwich method and why? 🗨️👇🏼   -------------- Want more tips in your feed? It won't get there by accident…   Check out my profile and follow (🔔).   𝗣𝗼𝘀𝘁𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗳𝗼𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗿 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗵𝘂𝗺𝗮𝗻𝘀. 😊   Repost to your network if it can help someone else. ♻