Understanding The Gifted Student Experience

The only thing more awkward than telling people you went to Harvard is... Telling them your kid is gifted. The G-bomb lands wayyy harder than the H-bomb 😆 There’s just no cool way to say it! You can see the energy shift—especially among professionals and educators. The raised eyebrow. The pause. The subtle lean back. 🚨 Alarm bells quietly ringing: Possible Tiger Mom detected. 🚨 Then a quick pivot to safer territory: “Ah, I see, academically advanced.” – Every time this happens, I wince a little inside. Because here is what giftedness actually looks like: ⭐ An 18-month-old who speaks in full sentences, but still wakes every two hours at night. ⭐ A 3-year-old who reads Roald Dahl, but can’t stop worrying about their own mortality. ⭐ A 5-year-old doing long division, but not quite toilet trained. ⭐ A 6-year-old chess wizard with sensory processing issues who eats exactly four tolerated foods. And on and on and on. Yes, giftedness always includes advanced cognition. But it is more appropriately understood as a neurodiversity, a highly sensitive nervous system, and unusually asynchronous development. – The problem is, most people don’t know this. (I didn't either!) They hear the word “gifted” and it is so loaded. It sounds like it’s about achievement. Or privilege. Or being “better.” I get why people squirm at that. I wish there were another label that didn’t carry so much baggage. But it’s the only diagnostic term we have today. And when we refuse to say the G-word, or use euphemisms like “advanced” or “accelerated” – the child goes unseen. Parents all over the country, in every type of school, are struggling to get their children seen and supported. A simple first step? Let’s start saying the word - gifted.

🚀 𝟐𝐞 (𝐓𝐰𝐢𝐜𝐞-𝐄𝐱𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥) 𝐊𝐢𝐝𝐬: 𝐆𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐝, 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐎𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐌𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐝. How can a child be both highly gifted and struggle in school? 🤯 This is the paradox of 𝟐𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐧—students who are exceptionally bright but also face challenges like 𝐴𝐷𝐻𝐷, 𝑑𝑦𝑠𝑙𝑒𝑥𝑖𝑎, 𝑎𝑢𝑡𝑖𝑠𝑚, or other 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑖𝑓𝑓𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑛𝑐𝑒𝑠. 📖 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝟐𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧? 2e students excel in some areas but face significant challenges in others. Their strengths can mask their difficulties, and their struggles can overshadow their gifts—leading to misdiagnosis and frustration. 🔥 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐦? Schools and professionals often see only one side of the equation. 🧠 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐠𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐝𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭: ❌ “She’s so smart—she just needs to focus.” ❌ “If he’s gifted, why does he need extra help?” ⚡ 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭: ❌ “He has ADHD—he can’t be that advanced.” ❌ “She struggles with writing, so she must not be gifted.” 💡 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡? 2e kids don’t fit into a single box. Their brilliance and challenges coexist, creating a complex learning profile that needs a specialized approach. 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐃𝐨 𝐖𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐥𝐩? A 𝐩𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐨-𝐞𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 can identify a child’s full learning profile, pinpointing both strengths and challenges. Here are tailored tips for 2e kids: ➡️𝐄𝐦𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐝𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲:  Recognize both strengths and struggles. ➡️𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭: Offer accommodations that address both needs. ➡️𝐍𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬:: Build confidence by focusing on areas of strength. ➡️𝐔𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞: Visual schedules and routines can help with organization. ➡️𝐓𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧:  Techniques like deep breathing can help manage frustration. ➡️𝐂𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐬:  Work with specialists who understand 2e students. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐊𝐞𝐲? 𝐔𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐏𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐀𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 2e kids don’t need to be “𝐟𝐢𝐱𝐞𝐝”—they need to be fully understood. With the right support, they 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐞.🌱✨ #TwiceExceptional #PsychoEducationalTesting #Neurodiversity #GiftedAndStruggling #UnlockPotential CC: Neurodiversity Belgium, Neurodiversity Education Academy, Staying Ahead of the Game LLC

Alice Miller's "The Drama of the Gifted Child" offers profound insights into the psychological challenges faced by gifted children and the impact of their upbringing. Here are ten key lessons and insights from the book: 1. The Burden of Perfection: Miller emphasizes that gifted children often feel an overwhelming pressure to meet the expectations set by their parents or society, leading them to internalize a sense of perfectionism that can be detrimental to their self-esteem. 2. Emotional Repression: The book highlights how gifted children may suppress their true emotions to please others. This emotional repression can lead to a disconnect from their authentic selves, causing long-term psychological issues. 3. The Need for Validation: Miller discusses the importance of external validation for gifted children, explaining how their self-worth often hinges on how others perceive their abilities, which can create a cycle of dependency on external approval. 4. Parental Influence: The author delves into the significant impact of parental expectations and behaviors on gifted children. Parents who are unable to recognize their child’s individuality can inadvertently stifle their emotional growth and development. 5. The Role of Creativity: Gifted children often express themselves through creativity. Miller argues that nurturing this creativity is essential for their emotional health and can serve as an outlet for their repressed feelings. 6. The Importance of Autonom: Miller underscores the need for gifted children to develop autonomy and self-identity. Encouraging independence helps them break free from the constraints of pleasing others and fosters a healthier self-concept. 7. Understanding Trauma: The book discusses how childhood trauma, whether emotional or psychological, can significantly affect gifted individuals. Recognizing and addressing these traumas is crucial for healing and personal growth. 8. The Value of Authentic Relationships: Miller stresses the importance of forming genuine connections with others. Authentic relationships allow gifted individuals to express their true selves and can provide a supportive environment for healing. 9. Psychoanalytic Insights: By integrating psychoanalytic concepts, Miller encourages readers to explore their own childhood experiences, fostering a deeper understanding of how these experiences shape adult behavior and relationships. 10. The Path to Healing: Ultimately, Miller advocates for the journey of self-discovery and healing. Acknowledging one’s own emotions and experiences is essential for gifted individuals to reclaim their identity and find fulfillment beyond the expectations of others.