Public backlash against women's career choices

Hello LinkedIn ! Imagine sitting in a job interview for a multinational company and being asked: "Are you planning to get married?" "Do you intend to have children? Now, ask yourself: Would a man be asked the same questions? Despite all the progress we claim to have made in workplace equality, these intrusive and discriminatory questions still exist. They send a clear message: a woman’s career potential is evaluated not by her skills, experience, or ambition but by her personal life choices. The Cost of Ambition: What Are Women Expected to Sacrifice? For women in male-dominated fields, like oil and gas, the reality is even harsher. What kind of job requires a freshly married woman to be sent to the field for seven or more weeks without flexibility? Is this about business necessity, or is it a failure to accommodate diverse career paths? I've been witnessing some sad stories of incompetent managers forcing a freshly married woman to stay in the field more than here rotation schedule basically "6 weeks" in the cost of her own mariage !!!!! The real issue is NOT women’s ability to handle demanding roles. Women have proven, time and again, their competence in high-pressure environments. The real problem is the systemic unwillingness to adapt workplace policies to support employees regardless of gender who want both a successful career and a fulfilling personal life. Men are rarely asked about their marital status or parental plans. Why? Because corporate structures were built with their careers in mind. But when a woman steps into the same space, she is expected to prove that she won’t “disrupt” the system with her life choices. Companies love to highlight their Diversity & Inclusion initiatives. But true inclusivity is not about hiring women just to meet quotas it’s about ensuring that they don’t have to justify their personal lives to keep their careers. If we want real progress, we must shift the conversation: - Stop penalizing women for wanting both a career and a family. - Stop questioning their commitment to work based on their personal choices. - Start designing policies that support all employees, men and women, in balancing career ambitions with personal fulfillment. This is not just a women’s issue it’s a workplace fairness issue. And it’s time for companies to catch up. Let’s break the cycle. Let’s demand change. #Diversity #Inclusion #WomenInLeadership #BreakingBarriers #WorkplaceEquality #WomenInSTEM #WomenInEnergy #WomenInTech #GenderEquality #EmpowerWomen #CareerGrowth #WomenInBusiness #WomenInOilAndGas #WorkLifeBalance #EqualOpportunities #Leadership #RepresentationMatters

We talk (a lot) about women rising to leadership. But what if the price of simply showing up is abuse? Globally, 19% of women report experiencing verbal abuse at work and 36% experience workplace bullying. But for women in public-facing positions — whether media, politics, client-facing or frontline roles — these comments can take on a life of their own. Just last week, a kind and talented peer was publicly trolled. Her crime? Quite literally doing her job and suggesting there might be a different way to approach Australia’s largest source of wealth generation. It’s not acceptable, but it is commonplace. Here’s a glimpse of what I’ve faced in 15 years in media, from the silly to the saddening: · A viewer emailed the newsroom to wish everyone Merry Xmas, going on to list all the qualities they loved about their favourite reporters. But not “that British girl. Her voice grates on me”. I hadn’t even been on air that day · I was once accused of attempting to manipulate oil prices and my employer urged to investigate me · Ditto on the investigating but this time for my coverage of the resignation of a Big Four CEO · After an interview on women CEOs (and the lack of them), I was simultaenously branded a diversity hire while also standing on the shoulders of women and telling them they couldn’t fulfil their potential. That one got so bad we had to turn the comments off. I can laugh about these now, mostly. But they aren’t isolated anecdotes and should never be shrugged off as ‘just part of the job’. They’re a reflection of what often happens when women step into public spaces and a barrier that deters women from taking on leadership roles and sharing their expertise; eroding confidence, and undermining crucial access to diversity of thought and opinion. I’d love to hear from you. If you’ve been in a public-facing role, how have you managed this kind of treatment? And what do you think needs to change? Share your experiences in the comments below.

Just how much are we prepared to pay for a pretty woman? When it comes to the workplace, studies show that although we may be initially seduced by good looks (research shows that we not only tend to view conventionally attractive women as more capable, but will even pay them more) once women move up the corporate ladder, we are more likely to invest in those viewed as less traditionally attractive. In fact Silicon Valley CEO Eileen Carey once told the BBC that when she began aspiring to more senior management positions, in order to be taken seriously by her colleagues, she darkened her blonde hair and ditched her contact lenses for glasses. In an interview with CNN reporter Julia Carpenter, Professor Jaclyn Wong confirmed that Carey’s instinctive desire to play down her good looks was supported by the the research she and her University of Chicago colleagues have conducted: "Once women get into managerial positions, positions of leadership, positions of power, beauty becomes a liability because our stereotypes around beauty are that they're incompatible with capability," Wong said. "So if you're too beautiful, maybe you're not that competent. Maybe you're a 'dumb blonde.' That's a lot more true for women than it is for men.” It seems that while we may be happy to hold the door open for beauty, we aren’t quite so keen to allow it a seat at the boardroom table. But what strikes me as most revealing about our complex relationship with attractive women is the backlash Carey received online after she first spoke out about her decision to play down her sex appeal, “Someone should inform her she is ugly. She's delusional to believe she is being hit on” said one commenter. “She's actually kinda cute in that last picture, but yeeesh...those glasses have got to go. Makes her face look all beady-eyed” added another. Therein lies the pretty paradox - whilst females are groomed to believe that their looks are their currency from a young age (they are fed on a diet of beautiful Barbies and cautionary ugly crones) the moment a girl owns her own pretty, she is devalued. She may then be labelled a narcissist, or in fact have her looks far more critically reassessed. Author and activist Feminista Jones called on women in a tweet that went viral to put this paradox to the test and “piss off” men by responding in agreement the next time a man gave them a compliment with a simple “thanks I know”. Jones claims when she does this, men curse at her. Why? Men must be, she argued, the “arbiters of praise.” Tweeting in support, Nicole David surmised that “…women are required to be beautiful, but also oblivious to it ”. Oblivious to their beauty - and also, preferably, able to achieve this effortlessly. Have you ever noted the backlash against any woman deemed as "high maintenance"? We will pay for pretty. But those who self-identify as beautiful, or confess to investing in the pursuit of it? They pay a price for that.  

5 Observations on the Double Standards in the Conversation Around Women's Careers and Motherhood The discourse surrounding women's careers in relation to motherhood, is often flawed. This warrants a deeper exploration to understand the complexities involved. 1. Post-Maternity Leave Challenges Women often encounter significant obstacles in their careers returning from maternity leave. These challenges manifest in various ways, such as disappearing opportunities and stalled promotions. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, approximately 70% of women with children under 18 participate in the labor force, but many face significant hurdles upon returning to work. The root cause of these issues lies in deeply entrenched biases that continue to influence workplace dynamics. The Institute for Women's Policy Research has found that women who take maternity leave often experience a "motherhood penalty," resulting in lower wages and slower career advancement compared to their male counterparts and childless female colleagues. 2. Bias Against Childless Women Conversely, women without children face their own set of prejudices. A common misconception is that their success is solely attributed to the absence of parental responsibilities. This perspective undermines their achievements, which are the result of talent, hard work, and dedication. 3. Recent Headlines Figures in the political sphere and the media perpetuate these biases, as illustrated by the recent labeling of Kamala Harris as a 'childless cat lady.' Such a label raises the question: would the same scrutiny apply if a male political figure were childless and owned pets? This double standard highlights the pervasive nature of gender bias in public and professional spheres. 4. The Truth About Bias Bias exists on both ends of the spectrum. A 2018 report by the UK's Equality and Human Rights Commission revealed that 77% of mothers reported a negative or discriminatory experience during pregnancy, maternity leave, and upon return to work. Women, regardless of their parental status, face judgments that can impede their professional progress. It is crucial to recognize and challenge these prejudices to foster a more equitable workplace. 5. Reframing the Narrative To address these issues, we must celebrate the successes of women irrespective of their motherhood status. Emphasizing skills and achievements rather than personal family choices can help end the cycle of judgment. Research from the Harvard Business Review indicates that women are 18% less likely to be promoted than their male colleagues, and this gap widens after women take maternity leave. Embracing diversity in all its forms is key to changing the conversation. By collectively acknowledging and addressing these biases, we can create a more inclusive and supportive environment for all women. Let's commit to championing equality and recognizing the potential of every individual. #Bias #WomenInLeadership #CareerSuccess #Equality

A common experience of women and people of color involves taking their most prominent and high-priority qualities and disparaging them in an attempt to turn these strengths into weaknesses. This tactic undermines individual potential while perpetuating harmful stereotypes and biases. The strategy is simple yet effective: identify the qualities that make women and people of color stand out—be it leadership, resilience, creativity, or empathy—and then redefine these traits as flaws. Terms like "DEI hire" (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion hire) are used to diminish the value of these individuals' achievements, implying they are products of affirmative action rather than merit. This approach tries to invalidate their hard work to perpetuate a narrative that they are less competent or deserving than their peers. Historically, women who displayed assertiveness or ambition were often labeled as "bossy" or "aggressive," while men exhibiting the same traits were praised for their leadership. Similarly, people of color demonstrating resilience and innovation in the face of adversity were often depicted as exceptions rather than the norm, with their successes attributed to luck or external factors rather than their inherent abilities. In today's workplace, this strategy manifests through microaggressions and coded language. Women and people of color are frequently described using terms that subtly or overly undermine their achievements. A woman who is passionate about her work might be described as "emotional," while a person of color advocating for equity and justice might be labeled a "troublemaker" or "token hire." These tactics are part of individual interactions embedded in institutional practices. Performance reviews, hiring processes, and promotional criteria often reflect these biases, further entrenching the notion that women and people of color are less capable or deserving. The impact of this strategy is far-reaching affecting the individuals targeted shaping societal perceptions and expectations. By consistently undermining the achievements of women and people of color, this strategy reinforces stereotypes and limits opportunities for advancement. It creates a hostile environment where individuals are constantly forced to prove their worth, often at the expense of their mental and emotional well-being. Furthermore, this strategy perpetuates a cycle of inequality. By devaluing the contributions of women and people of color, it limits the diversity of perspectives and ideas in the workplace, hindering innovation and progress while also discouraging future generations from aspiring to leadership roles. Change requirest us to recognize and call out these tactics whenever they appear, actively questioning the language used to describe women and people of color, advocating for fair and unbiased evaluation processes, and promoting a culture of inclusion and respect.

The "Competence-Likability" Trap Why are women still penalized for being strong? A study by Laurie A. Rudman and Peter Glick in the Journal of Social Issues found something so absurdly outdated it feels surreal: women in leadership who demonstrate competence and confidence are penalized socially, labeled as “unlikable,” while men doing the exact same thing are praised. In 2024, it’s beyond frustrating that women still face backlash for showing competence, strength, and assertiveness—not just at work, but in every aspect of life. When women lead, speak up, or stand strong, they’re often labeled as “unlikable” or “too much,” while men showing the exact same traits are praised for their confidence. This isn’t just a workplace problem; it’s a life problem. Women who take charge often face a lose-lose situation: show strength and risk being called “difficult” or “cold,” or hold back and be overlooked. For women in positions of leadership, this takes a toll. Women report constantly having to tone down who they are just to be accepted. Strength and assertiveness shouldn’t be values “reserved” for men. Yet, from boardrooms to friendships to families, women are often expected to fit neatly into boxes of gentleness and “likeability.” It’s exhausting. This bias doesn’t just affect careers; it shapes the way women live. It influences how we show up in our relationships, how we’re judged as mothers, daughters, friends, and partners. When we can’t embrace our full potential without criticism, everyone loses. Why are we still accepting this? Why should women have to walk on eggshells just to avoid labels that shouldn’t exist in the first place? Our society can’t afford to keep sidelining women’s strength and competence. What are you doing to support and celebrate the strong women in your life? #Leadership #GenderBias #EnoughIsEnough

She was called "bossy" for the same behavior that made him CEO. This double standard is costing brilliant women their careers. A woman in my network reached out frustrated last week. She'd been passed over for promotion again. The feedback? Her leadership style was "too aggressive" and she needed to "tone it down." Meanwhile, her male peer who joined the same month just got promoted to VP. His leadership style? "Decisive and results-driven." Same behaviors. Same results. Completely different labels. 𝗛𝗲𝗿𝗲'𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗰𝗵 𝗿𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗮𝗹𝘀: 📊 Women face backlash for assertive behavior that men get praised for. 📊 We're 25% less likely to ask for specific salary amounts. 📊 The same actions get labeled differently based on gender. 𝟯 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗰𝗵-𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗱 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗴𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸: ✅ 𝗧𝗵𝗲 "𝗔𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗦𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗴𝘆": Obama's female staffers used this successfully, when one woman made a point, others repeated it and credited her. Build allies who will amplify your contributions. ✅ 𝗨𝘀𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 "𝗖𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗮𝗯𝗼𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗙𝗿𝗮𝗺𝗲": Research shows women succeed when framing requests as benefiting the team. Say "This would help our team achieve..." instead of "I want..." ✅ 𝗣𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 "𝗣𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿 𝗣𝗮𝘂𝘀𝗲": Studies show women interrupt themselves and speak hesitantly. Count to three before responding to pushback, silence projects confidence. The system isn't neutral. But with the right strategies, we can advance despite the double standards we face. I have 4 more research-backed strategies that have helped hundreds of women in our community navigate workplace bias successfully. Comment GUIDE below and I'll send you the complete guide with specific scripts and examples. What labels have you encountered when advocating for yourself? ♻️ Share this if someone in your network needs it. #WomenInLeadership #GenderBias #WorkplaceStrategy #CareerAdvancement #Leadership

And so it begins. From some of my clients I am hearing more and more about backlash against so called ‘diversity hires’. This is a name given to people who are underrepresented (usually women) who get promoted in to senior roles. There are some people who just can’t comprehend that a woman, or a black person, could actually be qualified, experienced and the best person for the job. Sometimes they can comprehend but they just want them back in their box; more junior, more subservient, more quiet, more invisible. Either way, it’s misogyny. Over the next few months we are going to see these attack lines used against Kamala Harris over and over again. People discussing her gender and ethnicity in a way that just wouldn’t happen with a white male. And it’s these narratives in the media that shape opinions of the people that we work with. So what can we do about it? Well, for the a start we must continue to address under-representation by ensuring our culture is inclusive and we have the right recruitment and development processes in place. And, at the same time, we must address this ‘diversity hire’ narrative head on. As difficult as it can be, it’s about engaging with the people who are uncomfortable with women or any other under-represented group, being promoted. It’s about creating a dialogue where you have space for a two-way conversation but also where you provide clarity around what the organisation stands for and why. And letting everyone know that there are opportunities for all talented staff. More and more of my work is in this area. Providing listening circles and workshops for men who are feeling left out of the inclusion conversation. Strap in, it’s going to be a roller coaster few months watching our friends across the pond… #KamalaHarris #Diversity #Inclusion

I recently came across two different sets of comments by two different people for a man and a woman. In first case: the man was being appreciated for projecting his work, ‘he takes pride in his work’ Vs when a woman who makes meticulous efforts to meet deadlines and surpass expectations was labelled as territorial and abrasive: This reminded me of an oldish research that found out how for being assertive men are praised and women are labelled as pushy. And another research which found out that men are socially expected to be leaders and women as helpers. Therefore you see more non promotable tasks being assigned to women, I.e., ordering cakes, arranging office parties etc. And if they try to take a frontal leader role they are socially rejected and are seen as less likeable. "It's a Catch-22," Dr. Sonya Rhodes, a psychotherapist and author of "The Alpha Woman Meets Her Match," previously told Business Insider. "Whatever women do at work, they have to do it nicely. But the more you back off, the more they don't take you seriously." This makes me question whether we are really ready to embrace women leadership or diversity is still just a number to catch. #DEI #diversityequityandinclusion #womenleadership

What is the female backlash effect? Women who demonstrate behaviours in the workplace which deviate from traditional stereotypes can face negative consequences. During my career, I have seen this unfold so many times, particularly in scenarios when women are seen as too assertive. I want people on my team that are focused – who know and are clear on what they want. But for some, this bold mentality from women is too direct, too forceful, even rude… Maybe this is controversial, but when a man knows his own mind and shows it? It’s celebrated. 🎉 I have to admit, having to deal with comments about dominant females in the workplace is something I find a real challenge. There’s an expectation that women have to be nice and make other people feel comfortable. But there is a valid data-led reason why more women are adopting a direct approach. A global survey of 5,000 females showed that 31% experienced microaggressions at work, including being overlooked in meetings, dismissed or interrupted – typical consequences for women who speak up. Although gender stereotypes and old-fashioned perceptions still exist in the modern workplace, this is encouraging a generation of strong female leaders to adopt behaviours, and a new-found confidence, which makes them harder to dismiss. I strongly believe this should be applauded! 👏 As leaders, we have a responsibility to recognise gender biases and actively work to dismantle them. It's not enough to simply be aware. We need to encourage environments where women can be direct, assertive, and ambitious without facing backlash. Have you experienced this yourself? How do you approach it? #Leadership #WomenInTheWorkplace #Kersia